There’s nothing easy about life, so when the discussion around self-improvement and self-discovery comes up, it’s usually exhilarating. People hardly talk about the bullshit we must go through once we start exploring ourselves deeper. If anything, the process is gruesome, muddy, and uncomfortable. When you arrive at the starting line of a self-discovery journey, you start becoming aware of the ugly truths regarding your current situation and how disharmonized it’s been for “x” years. I know that feeling; I’ve been there. 

It’s like when you’re trying to grow out your hair after deciding to cut it super short. There’s usually an ugly phase of growing it out where you don’t know what to do with it — it’s no longer short but not long enough to comb it to the side.

What do you do in that circumstance?

You do the only thing you can do! Wait it out and respect the process by massaging your scalp, detoxing your hair from harmful chemicals, taking the right vitamins, eating greener, and staying consistent with treatments. The same approach applies to your journey! If you find yourself in the “ugly phase” of the process, don’t worry about it. This pain evolves into purpose, and your life will “grow out” amazingly.

The beautiful part about personal development is that no one can force you to start. You are the only one with the power who can decide to be MORE of who you’re meant to be. No matter where you are in the process, this three-step plan can boost your confidence and give you valuable tools for this personal journey.

Many moons ago, when I was soul-seeking and searching for my power, I created a strategic plan, just as I did for any campaign or business. I stepped out of a busy mind to help me see the rush of emotions and thoughts I was experiencing at that time. When we get stuck in our heads, it’s hard to find clarity among all the clutter. Mindfulness practice can’t change what happens around us, but it can change the brain to manage and cope better.

Here are three tips to boost confidence in your life:

1. EXPLORE:
   Ask yourself: What is important to me?

    

   Be honest with your answers and dig deep. Many of us are walking around, not knowing ourselves. And I don’t mean the fact that you’re a parent, spouse, partner, sibling, student, employee, etc. I’m referring to what fills you up with joy and excitement. We live according to others and haven’t taken the time to explore who we truly are.
   
   
2. DISCOVER:
   Now that you have taken the time to get to know yourself better and more profoundly, the next step is to have the courage to build your life around those answers. The intention is to discover the secret to unlock your full potential, identity, and purpose.
   
   
3. CONQUER:
   The last step to this three-step process is to teach yourself how to let go of any expectations, ideologies, or cultural teachings that have molded your entire life. Only because something works for someone else does not mean it’ll work for you. You are not them! Yes, this includes your parents, siblings, best friends, and celebrities that you admire. Remember, your strengths and talents differ from theirs, but most importantly, your life is YOURS to LIVE. This step is about approaching change and new challenges foundational to your formation. Conquer your fears and take leaps of faith. Make your strengths work for you rather than against you.